What Detracts From Your Beauty?

How attractive you are as a woman has nothing to do with your looks, your shape, or your body measures… The true beauty shines from within, and it is reflected in your eyes and beautiful smile and your overall energy.

What makes you unattractive as a woman is when you criticise and compare yourself to others. What takes away from your beauty is when you doubt and devalue yourself. And what ruins your charm when take things personally.

What is it within us, women, that compels us to devaluate ourselves when things go south? Why do we start questioning ourselves when someone says something negative about us, especially men?

It amazes me: no matter how gorgeous a woman can be, she will see some flaws when she looks at herself in the mirror. Yet, many men with big bellies never doubt their attractiveness.

Like I said, beauty is not in the outside but women question, doubt and underestimate themselves all the time.

What message are you sending to the world when you question and doubt yourself? What point of attraction are you creating around you? Think about the calibre of people you will be attracting in your life? Those who will give you even more reasons to question and doubt yourself.

It seems so obvious, yet we so often are oblivious to it.

I often wrestled with the feeling that I was a fraud. Which is bizarre because I highly value authenticity and being genuine, even if it is not perfect. But with the help of my therapist we identified that inner limitation that hinders me in my life. And yes, I do have a therapist: I can’t help others improve their life if I am not improving my own; that’s integrity for me.

My logical mind would go into an argument with my emotional mind. How can I be fraud? I live life with integrity. And always have. At least, I like to think so. And plus, I am very happy with my life, my family and my husband.

There is always something invisible and unknown within us that keeps controlling our life and sabotaging our success… And unless, we address it, it will keep controlling our life and we will call it fate…But you can fight the inner demons you see. You just need to have a courage to confront and challenge them.

There is such phenomenon as Imposter syndrome or fraud syndrome, when high-achievers feel inadequate about their accomplishments and being hunted by a persistent fear of being exposed as fraud. It astounds me that a lot of high-achievers, especially high-achieving women, feel like they don’t deserve success they’ve accomplished, they are not as good as others and they could be found out.

“I have written 11 books but each time I think ‘Uh-oh, they’re going to find out now,’” the novelist Maya Angelou once said. “I’ve run a game on everybody, and they’re going to find me out.”

Angelou was nominated for the Pulitzer Prize, and won five Grammys for her spoken recordings, plus a myriad other awards. But the “impostor phenomenon” had her firmly in its grip. Public acclaim didn’t dent the feeling that, deep down, she was a fraud, who didn’t have a clue what she was doing.

You’ve probably felt the same. I certainly have. Yet a crucial element of the impostor phenomenon is the sense that you’re the only person to suffer. So you may not find it reassuring to learn that Angelou felt it too.

“Sure,” you tell yourself, “she thought she was a fraud — but I really am one. And any day now, I’ll be rumbled.”

Trust me, no one really cares about you and what you think. But if you think less of yourself, it detracts from you. And men really feel it at the energy level.

Impostor syndrome shows up in the lack of self-confidence, self doubts, feelings of inadequacy and not being enough.

That’s one of the reasons, many beautiful women attract those guys who don’t treat them nicely, and they cling on to them out of fear of being alone.

And it is not that those women with impostor syndrome become less beautiful. Deep inside, sometimes, even without their conscious awareness, they don’t believe there are capable to attract and keep a high quality man, who will love, cherish and respect them.

The world usually sees you as you see yourself. I challenge you to write everything you think is true and fake about you that you’ve accepted to believe. Your beliefs are not carved in stone. You can change them.

If you can’t do it yourself, get help of a good coach. But, please do something, because, if you don’t, those limitations will keep sabotaging every aspect of your life. Click here to get the necessary tools for you to become an irresistible woman and attract your ideal partner.

Ukrainian by birth, American at heart, world traveler, who dares to go after her ambitious goals. Empowering women to achieve their dreams www.anna-simpson.com

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